harryedward:

why are yall trying to die so young 

cute-bird-dad:

kids are out here like “i wish i was alive during beatlemania” and im like….. beyonce is right here, right now, what is wrong with you. get right with jesus

speedlimit15:

*pronounces “hors d’oeuvres” as “horse divorce”*

boundtothewater:

She’s up all night to pet dogs
I’m up all night to pet dogs
We’re up all night to pet dogs
We’re up all night to pet puppies

"Pussy put his ass to sleep, now he callin’ me NyQuil"